Free Vibes for Furloughed Gov’t Workers

This damned government shutdown has really stimulated (no pun intended) some creative thinking out there.  This is a true story from, a website that reports on all things Michigan.

Metro Detroit sex toy company offering free vibrators to furloughed government employees

DETROIT — It’s marketing genius.

Tom Nardone of Birmingham, the founder of the Detroit Mower Gang, a prolific pumpkin carver, bulletproof vest manufacturer, a married father of three and the creator of a successful Troy-based sex toy business named PriveCo, has harnessed the federal government shutdown to bolster name recognition for his company’s website,

For as long as the government is closed, his company is offering 200 free vibrators per day to furloughed government employees.

1231790506Why not? She’s got nothing else to do…

News of the offer has already been picked up by national women’s magazine publisher Cosmopolitan.

Nardone said this in a comment he left on a post about his offer:

Hi! I’m Tom from Thanks for posting about us. We are going to fill as many orders as we can. We figure we can ship out 200 or so a day without slowing down the shipments of other customers. So, if you are bored with no work to do, order one. It really is free.

As of about 9:15 p.m. Friday, Nadone posted on his Facebook page that 40 orders had been filled.

“Are you a federal employee that has been deemed non-essential?” the website asks. “Do you have a little too much time on your hands and nothing to do? Is the recent government shutdown to blame?

“As vibrator enthusiasts, we want everyone to experience the pleasure that a nice vibrator can bring to partners and individuals. Besides, we know you have some free time, why not try something new?”

Nardone told “We are very picky about what products we sell and ship. Compared to any other free gift, I think our free vibrator is a great item.”

To see the story, and to read the hilarious comments, visit

God bless you, Mr. Nardone, for helping Uncle Sam to keep the sex hot and the tension down. Maybe you should send a complimentary toy to Speaker Boehner and Senator Cruz? Perhaps a good, toe-curling orgasm is just what these two need to get this mess over with.

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